The lowest point in my life: A journal prompt
I’m doing a bit of a heavy prompt today. I’m going to be talking about one the lowest points in my life yet.
It all started when I first began high school. I never had many friends before this point and I was confused and trying to find myself. While doing so I ended up mixing up within the wrong crowd.
I met my first best friend there within the first few days. At first I was excited, I never thought I could have so much in common with someone. This made me so happy. And because I never had many friends, I got ahead of myself very quickly.
Soon after meeting her, I found out a lot. She was living in a rough situation, emotionally abusive parents, she also self harmed and did quite a bit of drugs.
At this time, I did whatever I could to fit in with her. She continued to introduce me to people who were a lot like her. I fell right into all of their bad habits.
They convinced me to not care about myself or simply anything because “fuck the world”. (Sorry for cursing.) I became irritable all the time and treated my parents horribly. I stopped doing most of my school work and ditched school often.
At this time, I also started regular self harm around this time as well. I was very depressed and I was treating myself through drugs, influences, and self harm. I didn’t know any other way of coping.
At this time I was getting help as well, hospitalization was also considered at times. But I had a lot of trouble accepting this help.
Towards the end of the school year thing slowly began to improve in my life.
I started to realize what was happening to me. I also made some good friends, who are still my friends today. These friends told me that I was hanging out with the wrong crowd and that I deserved to be happy. They actually made me feel loved and cared about.Randomly, my friend who was the bad influence stopped talking to me. This was after she started dating a girl who didn’t like me very much. I remember being depressed and feeling betrayed over this. For a while I thought she was a true friend. I tried to talk to her several times, only to be ignored.
My friends started showing me screenshots of her talking behind my back. That was the deal breaker for me. I realized how awful my friends were to me at times. Then I realized I deserved better.
I dumped all my bad friends and bad habits and started working on myself to get better.
From there my growth was slow but now my life is so much better than what it was. I’m grateful for the friends and the family that have helped me grow and change.
I just want to say I’m in much better place now. And the friend who I originally met in my freshman year is also in a much better place. I’m so grateful to be where I am right now. I also want to thank everyone reading for the support you all have given.
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