What I Learned from Getting Demoted from my First Job

My first job was in the customer service industry, as most teenagers jobs. Since this was my first job, getting demoted made me feel awful. My most demanding task was having to talk to customers and serve them. I was also in a some what high end restaurant, so they were pretty uptight about employee performance. “The customer is always right.” Good morning demoted

But I had social anxiety, and this was my first job, so my shifts didn’t always go so well. I would constantly rehearse what I was supposed to say but when I was face to face with a customer, I would freeze.

Other than that issue, I thought I was doing a good job. I enjoyed working there, I loved my coworkers, and I was payed pretty well for a first job. I made mistakes sometimes, as everyone does, but no one said that I was doing THAT poorly.

Then I was in my managers office, crying. I was super embarrassed, I was especially embarrassed for crying. I felt like a failure and I wondered what I did wrong, I really wanted to stand up for myself, I was too ashamed to though.

My work gave me an ultimatum, I could accept the lesser position or I could leave. I obviously wanted to keep my job, so I accepted the offer. Now that I’m a bit older, and more experienced in the work industry, I’m glad I got demoted. It gave me a place to learn and grow from and I’ll explain why.

mistakes demoted1.It’s okay to make mistakes:

I feel as if everyone tells you this throughout your life, but it takes a lot to actually believe it. I always was okay when others made mistakes, but I never accepted my own mistakes. When I stopped dwelling on all my mistakes and I started realizing that it was okay, I felt happier. I also felt as if my work performance was getting better as well. Since I wasn’t so uptight.

2. Ask for performance reviews/Understanding why:

I always get nervous before asking the simple question of “How have I been doing recently” But doing this can help you understand why you were originally demoted and how you can grow from any mistakes you are making and fix them.

3. Always room for improvement:

There is always room to improve. Don’t let this fact get you down, it doesn’t mean you aren’t doing well already. It just means you can always be a better version of what you are. This kind of goes with asking for a performance review.

4. Being patient and taking the text steps:

You might enjoy your new position, for me I never left my job, I took it in stride and ended up getting paid more in the long run. After you spend more time at this job, and you get your head around how everything works, you may be given another chance. Or you may be able to ask to move back up after some time.

5. Feel free to ask for help

It’s okay to ask for help. My biggest help was my coworkers who I could go to when I was stumped or needed support. You don’t need to ask your coworkers either. You can also go to your family and friends for some advice and help as well.

6. It’s okay if you want to look for another job:demoted opportunity

I thought about getting another job after getting demoted, and I looked even though I wound up staying at this job. But if you feel as if your work is being unfair to you, you obviously have every right to leave and find a new job. Don’t go around telling every at your job that you are planning on leaving though, just do it on the down low and whenever the time is right, put your two weeks in.

If you feel like you’ve been wrongfully demoted-

If you feel like you have been wrongfully demoted, You definitely have the right to report this to HR if you have the documentation.

There’s a lot that I’ve learned from this experience. I’m glad that it happened this way though, and I don’t have any regrets for how things have went. Go with your gut feeling and do what you feel is best for your situation. Be proud of yourself for getting this far.
I hope that you all have enjoyed reading this post and is helpful to anyone who is in or has been in a similar situation.

Thank you so much for reading! Feel free to contact me if you have any questions and leave feedback and comments!

Love,
Rosie

 

Staying Active to Fight Depression

active depressionWhen you are struggling with depression it’s easy to stay in bed all day. But getting up and being active might be exactly what you might need. Staying psychically active can even help you sleep better on the side of boosting your mood!

You don’t have to do any extreme/crazy exercise either. It can be as simple as walking around your block. It’s even easier to get started if you are able to find something you enjoy, such as a sport or a yoga/dance class. It’s simple and easy, any kind of psychical activity can be used!

Start slow-

Don’t rush into it or push yourself too hard. The morning is when I tend to feel most depressed, it was a bit hard at first, but getting up just 10 minutes earlier to go for a quick walk or do some quick stretches made a huge difference. Eventually I was able to make that into 15 minutes, then 20. Soon I was able to join a gym and fit even more time into my day for psychical activity. There was no way I could have started off by going to the gym an hour a day at first, that would have made me very over whelmed. So moving slowly was key.images

Recently my favorite way to stay active is going to the tennis court with my boyfriend. Neither of us actually know how to play tennis, but we have tons of fun just hitting the ball back and forth!

Find a Exercise Buddy!

This can be crucial. If you have someone to exercise with, you will be more apt to going out there and actually doing it. It might even makes things more fun! If you know someone who has a gym membership and can bring a guest, just ask if  you could tag along with them sometime! You might have a lot of fun!

Do it Anyway-

If you are really deep in your depression and you find yourself really not wanting to be active one, try to just get up do it anyways. Even if it’s just for five minutes. It might just turn your day around. It may be easier to just stay in bed, but it definitely won’t make you feel any better.

The Science Part!

If you’re wondering exactly why exercising can help with depression, the reason would be the chemicals in your brain. Your brain sends out positive endorphin’s throughout the body, which can release anxiety and make you feel better. When you regularly exercise, overtime you will notice that you may be sleeping better, have less stress, and it can even boost your self esteem! All of these can turn your life in a full 360!

depression strength
Remember to be patient with yourself as well. You might not see immediate results and that is okay. Things like this take time, and at the end of the day when everything is all said and done, you may realize that you made a great choice. Take things slow and show yourself love!

 

Love,

Rosie

Please feel free to leave comments on feedback and how you use exercise to help with your daily life!

Self Esteem: 10 Simple Ways to Improve the Tarnished Ego

Low self esteem is like driving through life with your hand-break on.

Issues with self esteem is something we all struggle with at some point in out lives. Boosting your self esteem can greatly improve you life all around and is essential to  be successful at finding peace and happiness. If you regularly use these tips, you will definently see a huge difference

1. Focus on the good people in your life-

Remember they love you. Try to cut out all the toxic relationships you may have, they only make things worse.

“Toxic people attach themselves like cinder blocks tied to your ankles, and then invite you for a swim in their poisoned waters.”

-John Mark Green

2. Don’t dwell on past mistakes/regrets-

Everyone does something that they shouldn’t have at some point in their lives. Don’t worry or beat yourself up over those mistakes. Learn to let go and grow from them.

“Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes.”

– Oscar Wilde

3. Count all your blessings-

Remember to count all your blessings, both big and small.     

“Count your blessings to fill your life with bliss.”

– Debasish Mridha

4. Self Talk-

When you are thinking negatively, it’s important to shut your inner critic up. Remind yourself whats true and reasonable and whats not. I wrote and article on this here

“Adopting the right attitude can convert a negative stress into a positive one.”

– Hans Selye

5. Accomplish goals-

Set reasonable goals for yourself that you are able to accomplish. Getting stuff done will always make you feel good. 🙂

“Accomplish something every day of your life.”

– Walter Annenberg

6. Eating healthy and exercising-Self Esteem by letting go of the things that weigh us down

There are many studies showing how taking good care if your body can improve self esteem. And speaking from experience, I definitely agree. 

“Take care of your body. It’s the only place you have to live.”

– Jim Rohn

7. Be kind to yourself and others-

When being kind to others you will start to be kind to yourself. Seeing how happy people become when you are kind to them will definitely brighten your day. 

“Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.”

– Dalai Lama

8. Do not compare yourself to others-

This is super important and essential to finding peace and happiness in life. Everyone is struggling with their own problems. Focus on loving yourself. You are your number 1 priority. 

“Comparison is the thief of joy.”

– Theodore Roosevelt

9. Do what makes you happy-

Follow your passion. Don’t ever worry about what others what you to do, this is something I struggled with for a long time. Just do you. 

“You’ll be much more successful if you follow your dreams and follow your passions.”

– Jay Weatherill

10. Smile-

It’s super easy and simple. Almost too simple. But smiling makes us happy by sending off chemical reaction and releasing endorphin’s into your brain which will surely increase your mood.  

“Beauty is power; a smile is its sword.”

– John Ray

Remember, having amazing self esteem doesn’t happen overnight, so don’t get down on yourself for not improving quickly. Just try to use these in yourself daily life and stay optimistic. Be patient and show yourself love.

Much love,

Rosie <3

 

The Truth about Getting Help from Hospitals

getting helpWhen people talk about getting help by going into an in patient/out patient program at a hospital, they act like it’s some kind of prison. but really, and I’m speaking from experience, these programs are super helpful. Especially when something just isn’t right in your life.

Thinking back, I can remember a time when I was around 16 or so, and I was struggling with hardcore depression. I never wanted to enroll into a program because I was so scared. Many people said negative things I was told about these hospitals. A lot of these people have never even been in a program. But I was sick of how I was feeling. I had to get help, so I went to my schools counselors office. I finally opened up about everything I was feeling.

Honestly, at this point, I was scared shitless. Especially when my mom was called. I was scared she wouldn’t understand. And I didn’t want her to have to go through any trouble because of me. But the first thing she said to me is “I’m not mad, it’s okay”. I felt better but I was still scared. I knew I had to be evaluated and I was nervous of having to stay in a hospital overnight without my family.

But I didn’t end up having stay at the hospital overnight, I was put in a outpatient program that I had to attend everyday for about 6 hours. I was in this program for about two to three weeks, which was average for everyone else there.

Something I quickly realized while there, most of the people who did not like the program didn’t want to receive the help. The thing is, to get help and feel better you have to WANT to get help and feel better. they were in a negative mindset where they did not want to receive any help. The people who where thinking so negatively didn’t want help. Obviously not all programs are for everyone, but there are so many out there to choose from. I truly believe that there is one out there for you, and everyone else struggling. I was finally getting help. Keep your mind open. Keep searching.

During my time in the program, I improved greatly. While there, I had individual therapy sessions and group therapy sessions, we learned different skills to use in life once we are discharged. Some of those skills include different coping mechanisms, how to handle stressful situations and how to be mindful.

The best thing about the program I was in was that it did not interfere with being at school. My school still made some accommodations for me to be able to work stress free such as moving my deadlines back for my work. Many schools and workplaces will make these accommodations available with doctors notes, do not be embarrassed to speak up. Just remember that you are doing this to help and better yourself. You have nothing to be ashamed of.

Most people who I have met that have been in inpatient or outpatient programs always say that they definitely recommend it to others. Something to note is that you have to go to these programs with a positive mindset.

If you feel like there is too much weight on your shoulders to bear, and nothing seems to be working. You should definitely look into getting an evaluation and entering a program. Don’t listen to anything or anyone that’s telling you that getting this kind of help means your “weak”, “crazy” or “weird”. Do whats important to your mental health. If you need any help or advice feel free to contact me.

Thank you for reading.

Love,
Rosie

 

Immediate help/Suicide Hotline : 1 (800) 273-8255